Pages

Wednesday 15 June 2011

Why do people get involved in realtionships

Now this is the question that has been bothering for days."why do people get involved in relationships". Think about it. This question got me into asking two of my friends, Williams and Promise. This was what they said. 
Williams
To begin with love is a bond and where we are coming from, we are exposed to people, we live in a community where we interact with different kinds of people; its not like the United kingdom where  you " mind your business" this is your house: you don't even know your next door neighbour, so in our country where we are coming from we are exposed to neighbours and all that and then the more you get exposed, the more you meet people, the more you know people, the better chances of you going into a relationship. how do you go into a relationship?  you can for instance be a chorister in a church and it is not a department where  you have only boys with you, so if you don't like someone might like some of your characters, its just natural. Now one can begin to develop love; from likeness to love , at the same time your appearance can make someone focus on you,"this guy is so nice  " not that they want to date you but then, they are just trying to admire some of this features in you. Now in doing that, you will see that there is this bond the person is trying to have with you; before you know it there is this closeness and it grows, and before you realise it becomes relationship. The fact that you are not on house arrest; you have access to people and people have access to you, it becomes a relationship.
Sam-  well I thank you for giving me a general view of how people get involved in relationships but the question I asked was " why did you get involved in relationships in the past"
Williams
That was what I was trying to explain, I just want you to have a general overview of how they meet different people. Now its personal, different humans different characters. Like me I do admire the good handwork of God, when I see a beautiful Lady I admire.
Sam- let me be a little bit specific, why did you get involved in a relationship with IB?
Williams
We were once class mates in primary school and in my place once your name is Ibi-something they call you IB, mine is Ibinabo hers is Ibifubara, its like IB name sake(bearing the same name). Those days in my community they call name sake Gogo. So due to that name sake thing, we became close friends.We were close but in the sense that at childhood I do go to their house and they welcome me; my parents and her parents go to the same Anglican church, they work together and teach(mothers) in the same school as well. so there is this family relationship that helps to improve our closeness. We worship in the same church, we meet all the time, the more we meet, the more we grow in friendship and she had feelings for me, I also had feelings for her. By so doing we were little age... and when you kiss someone that period in Nigeria here you are free, you can do it, but there you have to hide and do it, because if you are seen in the act you'll be in trouble; so we used to do all those things that period but not in public, not love making as well. By so doing we started having something in mind for each other, now this thing happens to build itself(may be love) when we got to secondary school. Then we were exposed to a kind of environment that involves people kissing and doing some certain things, so we now had interest to build one relationship, we approached each other and love happens to stay.That relationship then, I will not say it was" lets get married or something", it was like fun, we see it as fun.
Sam- so what you are saying is, you entered a relationship because of what you saw around you and you wanted to have fun?
Williams- as a little boy then, that was what attracted my feelings. It was for fun, we don't know what we were truly doing, I'm not set for marriage you know... But some people will want to go into a relationship to get married, to settle down and some have different views. My own relationship with IB which you asked;when I started then in secondary school it was like fun then years later I started having the feelings to continue with the relationship.


Promise(why did you get involved in a relationship)
OK let me be sincere, it was a fling, we stayed for two months then we decided to make it official and I don't have any intention of getting married to her. It was for fun and don't want to flirt around with different girls and see what comes out of it. you don't know what the future holds, but I don't have the intention of  getting married to her.